Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Just to say that SHE IS PART OF MY LIFE!!! =)
Friday, July 11, 2008
Lover's Quarrel
(read it on http://www.articlealley.com/article_16963_35.html)
One minute you seem like lovesick turtledoves teasing, laughing and giggling with all your might. Then a few minutes later, you begin yelling and berating each other and a lover's quarrel is already in progress. A little bantering was all it took to stoke up a rising emotional tension.
Every now and then, no matter how close and intimate a couple is, an argument occasionally looms to create a tide in the relationship. Although sometimes it shakes a relationship down to its very core, if handled well, it is healthy and can help create lasting relationships.
Here is a list of what couples like you usually argue about and what you should do whenever you are faced with another petty bickering.
Individual Differences
When you first met, it may be the similarities you found with each other that instantly created the bond and rapport. However, as you knew each other better, it's your differences that potentially fashioned the strength of your relationship. Hence, it is important that you value the differences that make you unique as a couple. Perhaps, there might be times when you may want to change your partner into your view of his potential. But even if you'd succeed in your crusade, chances are you'd lose respect for him for allowing you to have done it and for not having the personal strength to be himself. So it is better that you both learn to compromise and meet halfway every time a conflict surges. Be ready to recognize each other's weaknesses and learn to appreciate what the other has to offer. Instead of seeing yourselves as separate individuals, practice seeing each other as an aspect of yourselves. In this way you shatter the illusion of separation and bridge the gap that's keeping you asunder.
Unmet Expectations
When a dispute recurs but too many times like a bad case of athlete's foot but you have no clue as to what's really causing the problem, odds are it was because your partner did not meet your expectations or he didn't meet yours. When expectations are not met, a spat usually ushers in. Depending on the expectations you may want to concede in your relationship, it is highly commendable that you bring your expectations upfront from the very start of the relationship. Determine which expectations are most important to you and which are most important to your partner. Spend some time tossing around what you both desire and need from the relationship and what you must have and won't tolerate from each other. Remember, love works best when it involves both give and take.
You're-Wrong-I'm-Right Attitude
Instincts often tell us not to give up and admit defeat in times of disagreements especially if we are certain that we are right. But come to think of it, does it really matter who's right and who's not? In a relationship, it is never good to assert too much if it means you could hurt your partner. Let go of having to "be right!" If you must speak up, do it lovingly. Never tell your partner that he is wrong straight in the face. If you do this, you may just stir a storm in a teacup and set about a violent outburst. Instead of having to be RIGHT, decide between your mate that it is more important to be HAPPY. Discuss in a loving way areas of mutual concern then agree on certain terms so that you prevent yourselves from meshing with future disagreements.
BurningHeart, creator of the background.haha.
Imarionette for suggesting the color, and the maker of the layout (limmdt).